H.L. Romquist began his career as a cake wrestler and briefly rose to fame in 1986 when he defeated a seventeen-layer wedding cake with pink frosting to secure the cake wrestling open championship title of Dorsetshire. Unfortunately, he sustained a career-ending injury the following year when a pineapple upside-down cake stood him on his head, and he was forced to retire from the cake wrestling circuit permanently and sell magical oils for a living. All too predictably, the magical oil bubble burst in 1999, and he had to pick up whatever work he could find. He took a position not answering phones as a customer service representative, he had an abortive little career selling insurance, he started a construction company that fabricated buildings primarily out of crackers, and he even got himself elected as a backbench politician until he was forced to resign in disgrace after a much-publicized tofu incident. Mr. Romquist now writes stories for children, and he earnestly hopes that his writing reflects the dignity of the insurance salesman, the principles of the career politician, and the syntax of the professional cake wrestler.