Making Marriage Work

New Rules for an Old Institution

Lynn Toler

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Paperback

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English

Agate Publishing
14 August 2012

Dating, relationships, living together & marriage

As the judge starring on the hit nationally syndicated television show Divorce Court, Lynn Toler witnesses, en masse, the thematic mistakes made in American marriages. She herself has also been wed for 22 years and has seen both the highs and lows of matrimony in her own marriage as well as the marriages of those close to her. While the national divorce rate hovers around the 50% threshold, there is a lot of chatter that marriage as we know it is an outdated institution--that we are too selfish, too unwilling to make sacrifices, and too misguided by elevated expectations of happiness to make marriage work. While these points may hold some validity, a lot of this chatter is nothing new. So what's causing so many divorces and, perhaps even more importantly, what are we to do about it if we want marriage to survive? Drawing from both her professional career and personal life, Toler sees that the biggest impediment to marriage these days is that couples decide to take the plunge based almost entirely on the most irrational criteria: falling in love.

Making Marriage Work doesn't suggest that love has nothing to do with marriage at all; rather, Toler says that love by itself is simply not enough to make marriages survive. This book is a logical and simple guide to reintroducing some of the practicality of marriage that has leaked out of it over the years. Marriage, Toler says, is a job, and it needs to be treated like one. However, the makeup and consistency of this job has changed so much over the past few decades that the old rules no longer apply. Making Marriage Work is an updated manual to help get the job of marriage done right in this day and age. It suggests specific procedures that should be put in place to bridge the gap between head over heels and happily ever after. It explains how to phrase things in order to span the great hormonal divide men and women often fall into when trying to talk to one another. It also discusses the very new and real challenges to marriage created in a culture often overwhelmed by the emphasis on (and ability to attain) instant gratification.

Replete with simple, no-nonsense rules, Divorce Court anecdotes, and stories about Judge Toler's own union, Making Marriage Work contains invaluable information couples can use today to secure their marital tomorrow.

By: Lynn Toler
Imprint: Agate Publishing
Country of Publication: United States
Dimensions: Height: 228mm, Width: 152mm, Spine: 15mm
Weight: 240g
ISBN: 9781932841657
ISBN 10: 1932841652
Pages: 224
Publication Date: 14 August 2012
Audience: General/trade , ELT Advanced
Format: Paperback
Publisher's Status: Active

Lynn Toler, a veteran municipal court judge, is the star of the syndicated TV show Divorce Court. Her previous book, My Mother's Rules was published by Agate Bolden in 2007.

Reviews for Making Marriage Work: New Rules for an Old Institution

Using her own marriage [and its troubles] as example, author Lynn Toler subtly lets readers know that having marital problems isn't anything shameful or abnormal but that it is fixable. In this book, she looks at how a marriage bruises, then she offers solid advice for newlyweds, Golden Anniversary celebrants, and everybody between. Toler then hints that the work is never done but that the rewards can be worth the effort.Never preachy or holier-than-thou, I think Making Marriage Work is good to read whether you've put a ring on it recently or decades ago. If you want to glue your I do, get hitched to this book soon.--Terri Schlichenmeyer The Bookworm Sez